Monday, December 29, 2008

Oh, hello.

Oh hello. Thanks for stopping by. I hope you have a hot cup of green tea in your hands, because in my experience, that's the only way to read blogs. Nevertheless...

I've been a thinker my whole life. A thinker and a dreamer and an analyzer and an over-analyzer and an analyzer-until-it-cannot-be-analyzed-anymore and then an analyzer questioning "can something ever be analyzed too much? Maybe there is a different angle here." That's just me. I've been a frantic, emotional, immature (and every now and then a little glimmer of insightful) journaller since I turned 13. I have about four or five completed journals that hold my life, my dreams, every little thought in my head since I started this crazy phase called the "Teenage Years." These journals are some of my most prized possessions, without a doubt. I hope to someday share these journals with my daughters as they walk through similar struggles: from self-esteem and eating disorders to faith issues to boys to sibling troubles to family relationships. A journal is such a frank, raw expression of yourself. Sometimes I've felt like ripping out pages and probably on only one occasion I have gone through entries with a big black pen, marking out sentences that I never wanted read. I'll probably regret that someday, and now I just choose to leave it all in there. The good and the bad. It's a part of me and my growing up years and I'm not going to hide who I was and who I'm becoming.

I've always had this itching desire to write. To write anything. I loved writing in the first few years of high school and seriously considered going for my Masters of Fine Arts in Creative Writing. Books have been a part of my life since I was a toddler and the written word is something that continues to inspire me! When photography found me, a career I am so incredibly thankful for, writing also found me on my photography blog. I'm a fairly open, transparent person (or I try to be at all times) and my photo blog is full of personal entries about my faith and my life and my thoughts. Sometimes I feel like I'd like a little more of a quiet place to spill some of my thoughts though; with just my words. No photos, no fancy blog designs, just these words. On the page. Or the computer screen. Y'know.

Sometimes I drive my mom up the wall because I just have a lot of things to say about a lot of things, if you know what I'm talking about! Quite a bit of my "schooling" life in elementary, middle and high school was spent purposely observing those around me. I love to watch how people interact, what makes them tick, why they act like they act--it's fascinating to me. Sometimes I would open up a word document and just write, write, write about two pages worth of things I thought about that day. Usually I'd delete them. As I'm growing older and basically approaching whatever this "adulthood" thing is all about, God is revealing so much about His glory and His love and HIs power in my everyday. I've started keeping a prayer journal and really seeking Him in an active way for guidance and direction in my life and of course, He is drawing near as I draw near to Him. God has lead me through a lot of amazing and hard things in the last six years of my life and I hope I can maybe even dig deep into some old journal entries and share some of them here, namely about some of my self-esteem struggles. I'm hoping this blog will just be a plain, uncluttered quiet-but-public place for me to be super honest and open about His guidance in my life. See you soon.

3 comments:

  1. i love this. and you are amazing. coffee for sure soon. ;)

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  2. Unlike you, I've never been much of a journaler. Not because I didn't want to have to, but because I didn't persevere like I should have. So lately I've been contemplating the past six years and how much I've changed during that time. I've been writing down my thoughts, struggles, prayer requests and answers, how I've seen God work, and the work He has done in my life. It isn't as good as if I were recording it along the way, but it is a record, a testimony, on paper of God's goodness to me. I know I'll look back six more years from now and truly appreciate have it!

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  3. Jamie,
    Did you live in Richmond Virginia w
    hen you were a kid?
    Megan Jenkins-Shrewsbery
    megandale@hotmail.com

    ReplyDelete